An Open Letter to Donald Trump by Thomas Emanuel
Well, this really has been fun!
My admiration for you, sir, has no bounds. You did it! You took every piece of the right wing’s unstated agenda, every single underlying motive, every wacko design to disenfranchise the great mass of the unwashed, every latent prejudice and you tore it open and laid it bare for all the world to see. There is no hiding anything from public scrutiny any more. There is no coded agenda, no latent craziness, and no embarrassing political position which has not been thoroughly waived in the faces of the body politic by your courageous campaign.
Your campaign has been nothing short of brilliant! The Party hacks are spinning in circles, smacking into walls and leaving drool marks on them. You made that little twerp, Rubio, sweat bullets. You took Ted apart and tossed him onto the trash heap. Bush never even got off the ground. The fat bubble from New Jersey has his lips so glued to your backside that it is going to leave a nasty bruise. Mitch is frantic because his reign of self-satisfied do nothingness is over. That stalwart political manipulator, Ryan, is reduced to tossing out the Constitution and his principles and backed into a serious corner, required to support you and your positions. And Reince Priebus (Reince? Really? I agree. Whoever named him should be shot!) is dancing all over the policy board like a demented monkey.
Speaking of policy, that giant wall idea is precious. The Mexicans are upset and thousands of them are getting their citizenship so that they can vote in this election. What could inspire them more? As an immigration policy it is positively fabulous. Who else would have come up with such a plan? Nobody! It will almost single-handedly solve about a third of the Mexican problem, and the follow on of threatening to deport all the illegals just enhances the project. You have undeniably energized the nation. And your policy of handling attacks on your ideas by doubling down on them or reinforcing them with an even stronger statement is fantastic. Never apologize. That is for weak and incompetent losers!
Plus, your powerful approach of making this election all about personality and media control is unmatched. Actual policy positions have never been less important in any election in the history of this nation. The cult of personality is the only game in town when you have the most vibrant personality imaginable. And what better way to run a really inexpensive national campaign than to get the media, especially the television media, to pay for it. You have gotten at least 3 BILLION dollars worth of campaign exposure without having to pay a dime for it. Remarkable, just truly remarkable!
Another great innovation is taking the unusual step of trashing members of your own Party. That crack about John McCain being a loser was so totally funny. Taking a warrior and a war-monger down like that in a military oriented Party is unheard of. Wow! That was fantastic! And speaking of war, your position against ISIS is just beautiful. Even if you don’t nuke ’em ’til they glow, it has the Pentagon salivating over all the new toys they might get to play with. Have to have the military on your side when contemplating a coup, right?
Of course your complete disregard of the Constitution is a wonderful preliminary preparation for a possible permanent Presidential status. The rubes are thrilled with your “telling it like it is” and “putting an outsider in power”. They have no idea what the hell they are talking about, but I know you could care less. They don’t count anyway. Even the Koch Brothers and other miscellaneous billionaires have backed way off of you, and are now scrambling to try to save their precious minions in “downstream” races, like those pesky Senators and Congressmen. They also don’t count, because you are going to do whatever you want no matter what some constituent-sucker thinks.
But there is one thing that I hope you will consider. DO NOT ACCEPT THE NOMINATION !!!
It is one thing to play games with the mindless elite who will knuckle under to anything touted by a billionaire, but it is quite another to try to carry that strategy into a general election. As you know, Hillary will kick your ass so hard that it makes the Goldwater fiasco look positively charming.
Besides being President is not worth it. Imagine dealing with a bunch of damn bureaucrats every day, whining and sniveling but having to carry out some policy that you thought of in the shower that morning. Plus you will have a horribly exasperating time with the new Democratic majority in the Senate. And the House, even if it remains Republican, will not be pleased at having to sit on their thumbs while you dominate every nightly “news show”. What a pain in the ass!
Your reasonable attempts to exercise your power as President will get you into a scalding bucket of hot water. Some idiot will raise hell and attempt to have you impeached. They might even succeed because of all the power brokers you have stomped on during your quest for the office. You never apologize so the doofuses in your cabinet won’t be able to protect you if you somehow stumble into a bad position because they didn’t gauge the crisis situation correctly.
Then there are other world leaders who will be eager to screw around with every initiative you come up with. They will be stark raving mad about your implementation of the wall. The rightful deportation of millions of illegals may not really go that well. The economy will suffer when illegals are no longer there to do the dirty work for peanuts. Plus the cost of the program, assuming you can get it approved by the Congress, will be enormous, further flattening the economy. The fools will blame you for this. Also, other fools will make you go it alone on ISIS. And God forbid if there should be a huge terrorist event on your watch. The whole world will be either totally pissed off, or chortling in glee as you attempt to deal with the fallout.
And consider all the money you will lose – the massive opportunities down the drain – while you are getting paid the paltry sum earned by the President. It is ridiculous. You can earn more than that in 10 days of interest alone on your offshore fortune. Why give up all those dealing days? And why face the obvious conflicts of interest you have with the German banks to whom you owe over 100 million? Think about it. You will have to divest yourself of those loans, and how are you going to do that without losing a ton?
So, here is the only reasonable choice: DON’T ACCEPT THE NOMINATION FROM THE REPUBLICAN PARTY. Drop those fools like the sycophant bastards they are. Let them squirm and try to recover from that. That would be the most fun of all.